The pandemic still rages on and so many of us have lost colleagues, friends, and family members to COVID-19. World Impact is mourning the loss of Cuco Moya, a beloved staff member for 14 years. He was an amazing man of God, pastor, church planter, mentor and encourager, father of two kids, and husband to Robyn. We are deeply saddened by this and standing on the hope of Christ for comfort and peace.
I am by no means an expert in grief counseling, but I have pulled together some of the information that is in Healing the Wounds of Trauma that may be helpful for us as we grieve the loss of our loved ones. Sometimes when we grieve, we think that we should not be sad because we have the hope that our loved ones who know Christ are in a better place. We feel it would be wrong to be angry or deeply grieved about a loss. This can keep us from healing. God made us with the need to grieve our losses.
For us as we grieve, here are some reminders:
- Grieving takes time and energy.
- Grief is personal and individual, and every person experiences it differently.
- You may feel like you are in slow motion at times or find it hard to concentrate.
- Anger and denial or numbness, in various forms, may pop up.
- You may feel sluggish or even depressed.
- It's okay to cry.
- There is also secondhand grief; dealing with a current death may trigger some past grief. This is normal and something you do not need to feel guilty about.
- Grief can trigger us in many ways – being aware may help keep them at a minimum.
Please talk to someone if you are struggling. Reach out to friends, spiritual mentors, and professional counselors. It might be helpful to write a lament. To pour out your feelings of sorrow and possibly anger or confusion to God.
Sixty-seven of the Psalms are considered laments. In a lament, people pour out their complaints to God in an effort to persuade him to act on their behalf, all the while stating their trust in him. The laments encourage people to be honest with God, to speak the truth about their feelings and doubts. People do not attempt to solve the problem themselves, but they cry to God for help.
Psalm 13 is a good example. Laments can have seven parts:
- Address to God (“O God”)
- Review of God’s faithfulness in the past
- A complaint (It isn’t a lament if there is no complaint)
- A confession of sin or claim of innocence
- A request for help
- God’s response (often not stated)
- A vow to praise, a statement of trust in God
Treat yourself with kindness, compassion, and without judgment, and reach out to others when you need to talk.
Similar Reading: Self Care in a Pandemic | Read more from Lisa Entz
Image by Ian Dale and the Trauma Healing Institute.
